We like to think our bodies are solid, but they're actually not.
The reason is simple: if an individual atom was the size of a football stadium, the nucleus would be about the size of a quarter ... and its electrons would be zooming around the upper decks. Meaning, there's a whole lot of empty space inside an atom. See?
So theoretically, probability says that if you kept trying for about 5 billion years, on at least one attempt all the atoms in your body would line up perfectly ... and allow you to walk right through a solid brick wall. Amazing.
-- --- --
After three days of effort, I finally managed to install two new electric outlets in Calypso's helm. The first day's progress came to a screeching halt when I dropped one of the outlet screws onto the deck, and couldn't find it.
The second day's attempt faltered when I dropped one of the outlet cover screws ... and couldn't find it either.
Losing two successive screws on a flat, unobscured 4-foot square fiberglass surface isn't just frustrating: it's maddening. I spent 90 minutes doing the actual install, but wasted 4 hours looking for screws.
Where could they possibly have gone?
I mean, it's like losing a marble inside a shoe.
-- -- --
I can sleep more easily now, after figuring out what happened: the screws' atoms were perfectly aligned with all the empty space in the fiberglass deck's atoms, which permitted both screws to fall straight through the deck ... and into the dreaded bilge.
Falling into The Bilge raises all sorts of puzzling new issues about warping space/time dimensions, most of which are too scary to discuss here. I think it's sufficient to say those two tiny screws are probably rolling around now on the lavatory floor of Oceanic flight 815. In which case they'd be LOST forever.
At least, that is, until tonight's season 5 premier.
No comments:
Post a Comment