Saturday, April 21, 2007

Donning the Marital Diaper

8:11 AM

N 34 29.600

W 082 49.206

Can you remember when you were an infant? Walking was struggle, verbal communication was impossible … and throwing a tempter tantrum was the most effective way to get attention and focus others on getting just what you wanted?

Those were the Diaper Days because nobody was much thrilled about cleaning up the messes we left behind us.

Picturing mature adults showing up for class or work wearing nothing but a diaper might seem like a hilarious scene from a comedy film … but wouldn’t be funny at all if we had to interact with that person in real life.

If the policeman directing traffic had nothing on but a badge and a diaper we’d want to know What’s wrong with that guy? If a waiter at an upscale restaurant showed up at our table in a diaper and tennis shoes we’d start steering for the closest exit.

Imagine opening the front door and discovering your daughter’s new boyfriend grinning back at you … wearing nothing but a grin and a diaper.

Picture yourself at a lavish wedding … and the groom enters the sanctuary wearing a diaper and dress shoes.

We’d know right away something was wrong and have some fairly serious reservations about whether the bride knew what she getting into … until she starts down the aisle in her veil and designer diaper.

I think I’ve already read enough about diapers for today, thanks

Face it, all of us were pretty superficial and selfish as infants. We wanted what we wanted RIGHT NOW and it didn’t matter how much we bothered or inconvenienced any one else. So far as we were concerned, other people only existed to answer and attend to our needs.

Obviously we didn’t always get what we wanted, or exactly when we wanted it … which left us feeling frustrated and upset. But by the time most of us were 2 or 3 years old we’d learned Lesson #1: You Can’t Always Get What You Want followed by Lesson #2: Whining, Crying and Tantrums Don’t Always Work … and firm words (or a spanking) sometimes results instead.

And stopped wearing diapers.

Because we started off as infants, convinced I Am the Center of the Universe, maturing and realizing we don’t always get what exactly when we want it is painful, but teaches us Lesson #3: Life can be frustrating when our needs, whether physical or emotional, go unanswered and ignored.

We got along fine without diapers for decades ... then one day we get married and try living with another human being … and suddenly there’s something that needs changing. All too often we think it’s the person we married, so we set about trying to change them.

Except they’ve already started trying to change us.

But It’s Normal for Married People to Fight and Quarrel … and Dr Phil Says So!

No it isn’t. Especially if the husband and wife are believers in love with Christ.

Think about it. You can belong to a church that teaches gambling, smoking, drinking alcohol, adultery and lust are the most heinous and despicable of sins … yet never hear one word from the pulpit about marriage and anger … even though the divorce rate among “church couples” is virtually identical to the national average.

I’ve heard married Christian men say things publicly to their wives, words so hateful and malicious a fist fight would’ve resulted if another man had said the same things to her, and be totally unconcerned about the pain they’ve inflicted. Probably because they didn’t “cuss,” use profanity or take the Lord’s name is vain, Amen.

But they’re still murderous, wounding words that reveal the selfishness and spiritual immaturity of men who call themselves Christians, but who could care less about letting the Holy Spirit into their lives or marriages.

They’ve got the diapers on … but are used to thinking of themselves as so important, their contributions so large and their committees so vital that no one would dare question their behavior, much less who’s king of their castle.

We have no king but me!

It’s a shame and the worst kind of disgrace that so many churches choose not to celebrate marriage, refuse to mention that sex in marriage is part of God’s plan, and timidly overlook teaching that marriage was God’s plan (not ours), created to bond a man and woman together for life to serve, honor and glorify him.

Sure I’m a simpleton, a fanatic and out of my mind, but ‘splain to me again how bickering, sarcasm and pouting fits into God’s plan and glorifies him. Please … but go slow and use small words so you don’t lose me down the path to fairy land..

Come on, Get Real. Married People Will Always Fight and Have Disagreements.

Can Christ argue or quarrel with Christ? Can God get irritable with God? Can God sulk and pout, or hold grudges to get even with God?

Then how can you behave that way toward your spouse? How can you offer your spouse less than your best, refuse to forgive her or love him any way less than totally and completely … the same as God loved us so much he gave us his best when he sent his son to die in our place?

If you’re a married believer, then who are you living your life for … and can other people see Christ at the center of your marriage?

Or do they see an adult wearing diapers instead?

Since you’re single, I think you need to shut up and start minding your own business when it comes to marriage.

I think you need to prayer up and start forgetting yours. Especially when it comes to marriage.

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