All About Mac

In the small-computer world people are largely divided into two groups: people who use Windows and people who use Macs.

Trying to have a meaningful discussion about the merits of either with owners of the opposite group frequently results in frantic 911 emergency calls to Animal Control, so I'm gonna lay off the hyperbole, stick with the facts, and see what Mac owners have to say about Windows.

1. Owning a Mac is a state of mind. Sorta like ether, or gagging on laughing gas.

2. I like Mac styling ... especially the optional colors. Colors, as everyone knows, helps computers run faster.

3. The Mac operating system is just better. Apple's first operating system was originally developed for people who had trouble typing. OSX carries this approach to the next level; now Macs are geared for people who have trouble reading.

4. Macs are easier to use. Especially for both programs (Photoshop & Illustrator) most Mac owners are familiar with.

5. Using a Mac is more intuitive. Than what, using a dishrag?

6. Mac does everything faster. Like fry their motherboards, raise prices on their peripherals, or reach obsolesence.

7. Macs are for creative people. More creative than me, because I can't imagine any good reason for owning one.

8. People who know computers use Macs. Yeah ... as doorstops.

9. I used to own a Windows PC but now I'm using a Mac. I'll bet you used to have a tricycle, too, but that doesn't explain why you're still whining.

10. Bill Gates is a space alien. Maybe... which would explain why technologically advanced civilizations use navigation systems stamped Intel Inside.