How The Grinch ... updated in hindsight

About 18 months ago I bought a new dishwasher. It's supposed to be the top of that manufacturer's line.

But I don't like it for two reasons: (a) the "Sanitize" cycle takes more than 2 hours, (b) Luke does a better job in two minutes. And the plates taste better the way he dries them, too.

I started thinking about cleaning up the house in case company maybe drops by tomorrow afternoon. Then I decided it'd be easier to just stop thinking about it. But shoot, I ended up doing it this morning anyway. Until around 2 this afternoon. I'll do the other half tomorrow.

I spent about two hours on Myspace tonight, just seeing who's there. I was surprised how many people were online. What kind of person has nothing better to do on Christmas Eve than Myspace?

I live a block from downtown and have been surprised all day at how quiet the streets are ... as though The Electric City had suddenly run out of gasoline. Then when I got in my car and headed over to dj's, apparently all the first-timers who thought Christmas Eve was a good time to learn how to drive decided to hit the roads all at once.

It's great how some things never change.

I'm glad the company I mentioned earlier never drops by The Blue Book. I think maybe I'd rather be at the marina with my head stuck in the engine compartment figuring out where that smelly exhaust leak's coming from. Company rescheduled for tomorrow and to be perfectly clear this time, I'm looking forward to it. No kidding. Really. Just no hitting, ok?

Nobody ever drops by the marina except Captain Mike ... and he's never irascible or exasperating. Hmmm ... maybe those two qualities add a certain flair and intrigue. And the thing with a boat is, when you see company coming down the dock you can just fire up the engine, untie the ropes and be underway before they're within shouting distance. Which of course assumes you have a boat that runs.

I think I'd rather spend next Christmas on a boat anyway. But it's definitely not my first choice. Let Santa Claus try to find me and then tackle climbing through my porthole.

One more thing about having Christmas on a boat: if somebody handed me a gift when I hadn't bought one for them, instead of saying "I haven't wrapped yours yet" I could shrug and explain, "You crazy nut, yours musta fallen overboard."


HAVE A VERY BLUEBOOK CHRISTMAS!

I LOVE YA'LL AND APPRECIATE YOU DROPPING BY!

I've got the best friends in the world (even the irascible and the exasperating), go to a church that's all about Christ every Sunday [gossiping's not allowed here at The Blue Book ... but somebody got some big news!] ... and those two things gotta be the best gifts of all.