Dayasagar ... or, Pass the Jesus

7:20 AM Tuesday

Just finished watching "The Bible in Movies" on either The History Channel or Biography, I forget. The title is self-explanatory and the show did a nice job of tracing how Hollywood (and the world film industry in general) has depicted the Bible since motion pictures were introduced.

The first silent films (including Cecile B. DeMille's The King of Kings from 1927) took their cue from Renaissance art and depicted Christ as a bearded, sallow-faced European with long curls.

Then when Technicolor arrived, Christ got a complete Hollywood makeover, including piercingly Nordic blue eyes, a pristine white robe from Wardrobe (just what you'd expect a carpenter to wear) ... and learned to speak with his fingers arranged to symbolize the Trinity.

And more often than not when Christ speaks in the movies, he's speaking Shakespearan (King James) English because, I suppose, "Whether thou goest" somehow sounds more scriptural and reverent than "If you go".

Contrast that familiar depiction of Jesus with the Christ portrayed in Dayasagar (aka Karunamayudu a 1978 production from India). Christ was played by an Indian actor speaking Telugu. Dayasagar used actors, language, costumes and symbols [see the attached frame from the Ascension scene) to make Christ accessible to its intended audience ... and was neither no more nor no less indulgent in that respect than our films use cultural familiarities to make him accessible to us.



During the 1960s several films depicted Jesus as a revolutionary and social activist ... and left his divinity out of the picture completely.

The point is that we want to make Jesus into ourselves ... as if Christ ever looked into a mirror, he'd see our reflection ... our hair, our skin color, our mental image of Him staring back.

We want Christ to belong to us instead of belonging to Him ... and use our conceptions of Him to turn Christ into a far off, stagnant icon who speaks to us in cryptic, 400-year old English from inside the King James box.

Because we're more comfortable and feel more self-righteous keeping the Creator of the universe inside the box we built than we are in actually opening the box ... and feeling His voice speak to our hearts and lives instead.

The Dangerous Book for Boys

I might buy this one for myself ...

Worth sharing

After Darth Junior and his mom left the couple sitting behind me began complaining to the server that folks who'd come in after they had already had their food. The woman wanted to know "what the problem was."

The server explained, "We're waiting on your eggs."

"Why," the mean customer huffed and snorted, "are we waiting on my eggs?"

The server smiled back and told her, "Because the chicken hasn't laid 'em yet."


True.

A daydream date with my daughter

6:34 AM

I was driving to my Lasik follow-up appointment the other morning, listening to a preacher on the radio describe what his daughter’s first dates were gonna be like. Hmmm, how did he have the vision to describe such a thing?

Because he’d already been thinking about it and planning for it. Because the first man his daughter would be dating would be him.

That splash of ear-fuel hitting the brain tank ignited my ADD engine and sent me galloping off with my thoughts … and also explains how I totally spaced-out where I was going and ended up lost for 20 minutes wandering around Brown Road.

At least I came home with a short list.

Impressions of what my daughter should expect on our dates: Not A Literal, Verbatim List

- I’d be so excited to spend time in public with my daughter that I couldn’t wait for Friday (or Saturday) night to roll around. Hopefully she could sense that when I showed up, too.

-I’d be there on time and meet her up at the front door (without whining like a baby with a wet diaper if she was running late; she’s been worth waiting for for this long, after all). And I’d have my phone off for the duration of the evening because she’s worth and deserves my full attention.

-The first thing I’d tell her is “Wow.” And being a young woman she’d know what I meant.

-I’d tell her mom “Thank you” for trusting me, followed by telling her where we were going and what time we’d be back.

-I’d open my daughter’s car door for her. I’d open all her doors for her. I’d walk on the street side of the sidewalk and I’d walk at her arm, behind her … not lunging ahead first so she can tag along behind like a whipped puppy dog looking to be led to the pound.

-Driving to our date, I’d wanna let my daughter know I’m looking forward to spending time with her. Then I’d shut up, give her my undivided attention and let her talk. Without interrupting, getting impatient or changing subjects to suit me.

-Once we were in public, whether we met new people or ran into friends we already knew, I’d introduce her, “I’d like you to meet the most beautiful unmarried woman in the world.”

And continue treating her that way to show her I meant it.

Does that sound silly so far? I don’t care … because there’s a stinger ahead I forgot to mention: If my daughter has a terrible time on our dates, if I turn out to be a dud, if it turns out she’s uncomfortable being around me then she has the choice of whether or not to go out with me again.

Just so she’ll know from the very beginning that she always has the dating-discretion of telling a man No … and isn’t uncomfortable about making that choice and standing by it.

Finally, I’d live up to my word and have her home in time … sober and still respecting herself. (Heck whaddya think, would a goodnight hug on our first date be outta the question? See, affection is part of the dating equation but sex doesn’t have to be … and I’d rather my daughter wasn’t yearning for physical affection from men to compensate for an emotional deficit at home.)

So what would my daughter think of our date? Hopefully she’d have an awesome time, and wake up the next morning glad we went out. Hopefully she’d be eager that I’ll ask her out again soonest.

Maybe even look forward to our next date as much as I would

I hope “Dates with my Daughter” would be a foundation, a chance for us to interact and learn about each other apart from the tedium and stress of daily family interaction. I’d want to give my daughter a chance to see me “in the world” and decide for herself what qualities she’ll find attractive in a man … and be an illustration for comparison when time comes for her to start dating “other” men.

So she’ll spot losers, liars and creeps long before they get a chance to come near the front door.

Gee Papa Fairytale, that’s a pretty picture and all but it’s totally out of touch, boring and unrealistic.

Well, that could say lots about our pasts and who we’ve squandered dates (much less relationships) with … and again points back to this: Believing that sex, drugs, drama and desperation are essential components of “Dating & Relationships” reveals a spectacular lack of imagination.

And a bulging deficit of self-worth /self-control, too.

Hey PS. it’s Sunday … and we’ve got reason to celebrate our hearts (and lungs) out! ILYG and hope you never get tired of knowing it.

Today’s Top 20/20 My Eye's Much Better, Thanks Playlist:

I Can See Clearly Now – Jimmy Cliff

Adaptive Behavior

There's a kid about 8 years old sitting with his mom at a table just about arm's length from me here at HH.

So far the boy's knocked his silverware on the floor, gone out to their car to retrieve his jacket, announced his return by throwing the keys back at mom, spun his chair around on the floor like he's sitting on stool ... I'd keep going but you get the idea.

Is this attention deficit disorder? Yeah ... and mom's got it ... because her attention's burrowed inside today's newspaper.

For whatever reasons (I'm 100% sure they're valid; excuses always are, especially when they're indulgently self-pitying) she's missed noticing her son is out of control. In other words, he's adapted to his environment, and she's become a mute witness to the train wreck that hasn't happened yet.

Awww come on cut them some slack, he's just a kid.

You're right. Give him ten or 20 years and he'll stop adapting and grow out of it.

Hopefully before he shows up in the driveway with a condom in his wallet and blows the horn to take my daughter out on a date.

b/c I'm too old to adapt.

postmortem: doctors of divinity examine Christ

Friday Nov 9 2007 7:14 AM

I was never a very good student, and college proved it. After three full-time years (including summers) I was still a sophomore, and the prospect of graduation still far off on the horizon. Then one afternoon the Dean called me and my folks in for an informative chat.

The Dean closed the sad folder containing copies of my report cards and told my parents, “I don’t find anything here to indicate that Joseph has the ability to do work at the college level” and then booted me out of school because I was "only there taking up space."

Ouch.

Here we are years later, and I take a mental deep breath every time I log onto Blogger with the optimistic intention of sharing what’s on my mind … because you, Dean Reader, might conclude there’s nothing here to indicate that I have the ability to perform at the web level, either.

Well, I feel better telling myself that I’m not actually dropping the intellectual ball when I blog: I’m just dribbling down court as fast as I can.

-- --

Where is the wind
Have you seen it

Where did it go
And how do you know?

You saw it knock down trees
And make the sky howl in storms
Then afterward
Coax one leaf and a drop of dew
Along their separate paths

You heard the its voice like a whisper
Felt its arm on your back

Its finger brush your face
Like a kiss
The breeze
Lingering over your smile

Have you seen where it comes from
Can you follow along
Or know any of the places
It’s going

Can you? Would you?

The wind carries voices into words at your ears
Cradles birds through the sky

Carries butterflies in its palm and
Casts tides against the shore
Molds rain bracelets from silver clouds

Scatters rose petals at your feet
With a caress then
Wraps itself around you and
Whispers life into your lungs

Have you seen it?

Did the wind ever forget or
Ignore you
Or go out of its way
To step around you?

Can you build a wall
That stands taller than the wind?

Can you hold the wind
When it’s swirling all around you?
You already know
Don’t you

It's before you and after you too

Have you seen it?

Can you tell me why it’s waiting
Where it’s going or
Why it's here?

Can you open your arms wide enough
To hold and
Keep it with you
When you feel
It isn't there?

-- -- --

Watched “The Trial of Jesus” Wednesday night on The History Channel. It was fascinating listening to prominent theologians from the world’s most prestigious universities candidly explain that:

-The gospel accounts of Christ’s life are actually fictions
-The only information regarding Christ found in (non-gospel) sources can be summed up with “A man named Jesus was executed by the Romans in about the year 30”
-Christ was merely one of a small crowd of first-century messiahs, spiritual leaders or “magic men” traveling the Judea countryside preaching or prophesying about God’s pending kingdom on earth
-The gospels are derived from oral traditions, rumors and speculation … and thus have nothing to do with facts or historical evidence
-Each gospel was created as a response to answer new doubts as Christianity’s socio-political climate changed

Hmm, thought mr. mud brick as he scratched his empty head and felt more words fall down the spout ...

Without hard evidence, whether from archaeological discoveries or from secular contemporary accounts, academics must torque up their reason-wrenches and three-handed screwdrivers ... shop-worn paradigms and dull deductive tools with names like Hermeneutics, Homiletics, Soteriology (but precious little Pneumatology) … to loosen up “What’s probable” and “It’s reasonable to assume” or “It’s unlikely that" and pop the hood on the gospels and figure out what's underneath .... then impress each other by explaining in tenure-terms exactly what makes Christianity run.

Me? I'm dumber than a jelly roll.

Because I'm pretty sure academic theologians could use the same methods and reasoning to prove the wind ain't real and isn't there, either.

Learning to let go, let it all go

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law."

-Galatians 5:22-23

Mechanized Murder & a sexual backfire

Heard rumors back in high school that in earlier years, students enrolled in Driver's Ed were required to watch an educational film with the lurid title Mechanized Murder.

The film was allegedly produced by the Florida Highway Patrol and amounted to a compilation of truly grisly traffic accidents, and showed real victims in the aftermath ... decapitated, burned to death, dismembered or whatever ... to shock and awe 16 year old drivers into driving responsibly and obeying every traffic rule to the letter of the law once they were turned loose on the highway.

Googling to find proof that such a film actually existed's been fruitless so far but it must've existed because a history teacher told us the film was removed from the Driver's Ed program because it back-fired:

Students were either desensitized by the bloody carnage and thought "That'll never happen to me" or became fatalistic, as if the consequences of their driving lives were out of their control. Or worse ... they started laughing because the human, life-changing consequences of the bloody scenes they were witnessing was way beyond their emotional grasp/maturity.

In a nutshell, Mechanized Murder made the situation it was intended to remedy far worse.

Drivers, whether teen aged or not, drive responsibly when they understand how their actions behind the wheel can permanently impact innocent folks ... the other drivers and pedestrians in the street ... or hurt and inflict grief back home on the folks who love them.

My eye is hurting too much to keep typing a parallel to wrap a nice ribbon around a conclusion except for this:

Love Beats Fear, Threats, Intimidation and Legalism Every Time

Those things are the opposite of love... and we've had 2000 years to see it.

When?

When's the last time you felt appreciated?

When's the last time you felt loved?

Can't Miss Seeing This

From The "All OPPOSED Say Eye" Department

Vision still a bit blurry after PRK surgery on the left eye yesterday morning ... but that didn't prevent me from spotting the "GIRLS GONE WILD coming to Anderson" headline on the front page of today's paper.


Blame those terrible billboards for first introducing this kind of filth to our community, I guess. Sure.

Now let's act indignant & react by making signs so we can protest outside the mall during business hours. That'll show 'em.


Thank you BM for the cookies and to PM for taking time from work yesterday to shuttle me back & forth. ILYG!

My life would be so... [updated]

My life would be so much easier if 2000 years ago, 11 men had not said He has risen. Because lies are so much easier to believe. listen

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Signs of the Times

Chlamydia is the most frequently reported bacterial sexually transmitted infection in the United States. Three of every four reported cases occurred in persons under age 25. Chlamydia is so common in young women that, by age 30, 50% of sexually active women have evidence that they have had chlamydia at some time during their lives.


Nationwide one out of five adolescents and adults have had genital HSV infection.

By the age of 24, one in three sexually active people will have contracted an STI (KFF, 1998).

Percent of population having had first intercourse, by age

Males	Females
25% by age 15	26% by age 15
37% by age 16	40% by age 16

Average age of first intercourse, by gender

Males	Females
16.9	17.4

27% of teenage women using contraceptives choose condoms as their primary method. (AGI, 2002).

18-29 year olds have sex an average of 112 times per year

At the end of 2003, an estimated 1,039,000 to 1,185,000 persons in the United States were living with HIV/AIDS, with 24-27% undiagnosed and unaware of their HIV infection (Glynn & Rhodes, 2005).

Almost 1 million teenage women, 10% of all women aged 15-19 and 19% of those who have had intercourse, become pregnant each year (AGI, 1999).

The one on top is my favorite

I'll take it from here, thanks

I've never been driving down the road and suddenly had the car catch fire/blow up/explode out from under me.

And so far as I remember no truck I've been driving has ever been hit and destroyed by a meteorite. Come to think of it, I've never been a passenger on an airplane and suddenly had the wings or engines fall off either.

So why think about and dwell on such things?

Just because they haven't doesn't mean they're not about to ... which is enough to move me to take preemptive control right away:

1) From now on, any time I start thinking my vehicle (or whatever car I'm riding in) might break down or otherwise not carry me the entire distance of my journey, I'm immediately pulling over, parking and walking the rest of the way. Just to make sure I get there.

2) Any time I'm on an airplane and get bored, which leads me to start thinking "The pilot has no idea what he's doing" or anxious that "I'm behind schedule because the pilot forgot my schedule's important, " then I'm (a) denying the pilot exists; followed by (b) jumping out the emergency exit to take control of and save my own life.

After all, ain't it better to have Fall-back Plan #37 ready in case God forgets what I want?


"Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God."
-Luke 12:6 NIV

Zowie Powie

Last week I took this photo of Steve's (a guy on my dock) new bike:


Found out this morning a young lady chatting on her cell phone turned left and did a U-turn in front of Steve.

Steve's new bike got totaled and ended its life at just 130 miles.

Fortunately, Steve survived with only a limp.

DRIVING IS A FULL-TIME JOB WITH LIFE-ALTERING CONSEQUENCES

PLEASE DRIVE WITH BOTH EYES OPEN

Music, Joy & Sacrifice

Then my head will be exalted
above the enemies who surround me;
at his tabernacle will I sacrifice with shouts of joy;
I will sing and make music to the LORD.

-Psalms 27:6

Obedience

May my tongue sing of your word,
for all your commands are righteous.

-Psalm 119:172

Perfect Vanity

Nobody drops by my blog looking for perfect analogies or expecting slick intellectual insights. The Blue Book clumsily still saws each timber by hand ... and turns out 2x4's and fence posts with all their flaws and imperfections intact.

Gotta admit I have a hard time watching reality TV.

Not the shows where human beings make fools of themselves to win money or fame in fake situations that have nothing to do with "Real Life," but the real real-life shows ... like the ones on National Geographic Channel starring The Hungry Lion family or the Starving Hyenas next door.

I won't go into the gruesome details; you can click on either link [above] and see exactly what I'm talking about if you're interested. At least if you watched, you'd know quite vividly what I'm referring to.

It's amazing that

-a Zebra mare will ignore the jaws of hyenas and run beside her colt to protect and save it from being eaten alive without regard to her own safety

-a Cape Buffalo female will willingly separate herself from the safety of the herd to race forward and protect her calf from a half-dozen lions intent on eating it alive

-female Elephants will swarm around and conceal an injured calf between their legs to protect it from being singled-out and devoured by predators

I'm awed by their Courage and frankly, their absolute Fearlessness in literal life-and-death situations usually leaves me in tears. I mean Heck ... I'm awed that none of them ran away explaining that graduation or their careers or their finances or disappointing their parents came ahead of fighting to save the lives of their offspring.

Go ahead & roll your eyes ... "Hey Papa Stupid, we're different. We're not animals, are we?"

Nope, because animals don't trust what they see on TV or put their faith in lies.

Only human beings could be so vain to create a "pro-choice" culture and then argue that destroying one's own offspring is rational and a "right."

All right, young lady ...

Don't have sex.

"But I'd rather you take these than get pregnant and ruin your future. Just don't say anything to your father ... I told him it's because you get such bad cramps."


Right right right.

Do numbers really matter?

"A groundbreaking ABC News "Primetime Live" survey finds a range of eye-popping sexual activities, fantasies and attitudes in this country, confirming some conventional wisdom, exploding some myths -- and venturing where few scientific surveys have gone before."
-http://abcnews.go.com/Primetime/PollVault/Story?id=156921&page=1

Total Number of Sex Partners
	Average	Median
All	13	5
Men	20	8
Women	6	3

Total Number of Sex Partners
	All	Men	Women
One	19%	12	25
2-4	25	16	33
5-10	28	26	29
11-20	12	18	6
21+	12	20	4

First-time sex was too young:
Men	37%
Women	50

-Sexually active young people report a median of two partners in the last year, compared with a median of one for other adults.
-Concern about AIDS and other STDs peaks, at 59 percent, among anyone who's had two or more sex partners in the last year

-Four in 10 [young people] say sex without an emotional relationship is OK

Did this really happen?

I was surprised this Clemson Homecoming Weekend to see how many folks at the marina have Gamecock decals on their cars during the week, but have Clemson season tickets, wear orange on game day Saturday and are raising their kids to be Tiger fans.

They simply explained that which team they cheered for during the week was a private matter, that they didn't want to offend their friends and co-workers (who are Carolina fans), and besides ... who they cheered for in private was nobody else's business because all teams are ultimately the same.

Yeah right, like that would ever happen.

I mean, not on Saturday anyway.

Today's "I'm Too Trashed from Church to Make The Game"* Playlist
The Noise We Make

* Nobody ever says that, do they? Because worship is postpone-able, but kickoff time ...

Add to the top of Today's Must-Have List

The definitive golf-ball display case.

Soirce.com

Yesterday, I realized...

Yesterday, I realized it's my bad, my bad, my ooh so bad, Celit(?) Masa(?) has no chance of winning the World Drivers Championship. I'm easily confused. Sorry. Oops.
Click here to listen

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RTSS/AS02

"Scientists have been on the lookout for a malaria vaccine since the 1970s but no vaccine has demonstrated a protection rate of more than 35% [emphasis added]. Meanwhile, malaria continues to ravage nations and rob children of their lives. Annually, malaria affects half a billion people across the world, killing 2-3 million people. A child is killed every 30 seconds around the world." - Vaccine kindles hope

STATISTICS ON MALARIA

• Malaria is one of the planet's deadliest diseases and one of the leading causes of sickness and death in the developing world. According to the World Health Organization there are 300 to 500 million clinical cases of malaria each year resulting in 1.5 to 2.7 million deaths.
• Children aged one to four are the most vulnerable to infection and death. Malaria is responsible for as many as half the deaths of African children under the age of five. The disease kills more than one million children - 2,800 per day - each year in Africa alone. In regions of intense transmission, 40% of toddlers may die of acute malaria.
• About 40% of the world's population - about two billion people - are at risk in about 90 countries and territories. 80 to 90% of malaria deaths occur in sub-Saharan Africa where 90% of the infected people live.
• Sub-Saharan Africa is the region with the highest malaria infection rate. Here alone, the disease kills at least one million people each year. According to some estimates, 275 million out of a total of 530 million people have malaria parasites in their blood, although they may not develop symptoms.
• Of the four human malaria strains, Plasmodium falciparum is the most common and deadly form. It is responsible for about 95% of malaria deaths worldwide and has a mortality rate of 1-3%.
• In the early 1960s, only 10% the world's population was at risk of contracting malaria. This rose to 40% as mosquitoes developed resistance to pesticides and malaria parasites developed resistance to treatment drugs. Malaria is now spreading to areas previously free of the disease.
• Malaria kills 8,000 Brazilians yearly - more than AIDS and cholera combined.
• There were 483 reported cases of malaria in Canada in 1993, according to Health Canada and approximately 431 in 1994. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention in the United States received reports of 910 cases of malaria in 1992 and seven of those cases were acquired there. In 1970, reported malaria cases in the U.S. were 4,247 with more than 4,000 of the total being U.S. military personnel.
• According to material from Third World Network Features, in Africa alone, direct and indirect costs of malaria amounted to US $800 million in 1987 and are expected to reach US $1.8 billion annually by 1995.

-source here

Farewell, old friends

I've had these for 12 years and hate to throw them out.

Fear, not Choice

Back in college, Don and I had a friend named Tim. Tim was from Illinois, was raised Catholic, and played on the offensive line. You may have already guessed, because he played college football, that Tim was quite strong.

One time I saw Tim pick up a 150-pound barbell (not a dumbbell or curling bar) and do a standing military press ... with one hand ... so your guess woulda been correct.

Tim had even stronger morals and values than that: another friend's girlfriend once made a "suggestive overture" to Tim. He responded by first addressing her appropriately (rather than by name), then let her know she had a CHOICE to make: either she told her boyfriend what she'd done, or he would.

She had a big choice to make ... and neither outcome looked pretty or desirable.

The reason Tim didn't take the girl up on her offer wasn't because Tim was afraid of her boyfriend (or of anybody else). Tim also faced a choice , but his decision not to have sex with the girl was based on strength ... not on opportunity or convenience.

Also worth mentioning that Tim didn't have sex with his friend's girlfriend and then lie about what he'd done, or sneak around behind his friend's back and then claim that he hadn't. Tim didn't have a quickie on the floor beside the couch and then apologize "I'm sorry, but I was drunk" to her boyfriend. Or shrug "It was just that one time."

Tim could do one-handed presses with 150 pounds, for pete's sake. Tim wasn't easily impressed ... not by what either men could do or by women thought about him ... which meant he wasn't afraid to tell the truth, always, and then act according to strength.

Tim was too strong to be weak.

And lying, like making excuses, is a playground for weaklings.

Who knew?

Just found out this morning the 1985 Carver Riviera was available in a hardtop model.

Wow.

Call Me ... just don't answer

(a) I just won't necessarily answer, or (b) listen to your message. But (c) don't answer when my number pops up on your phone.


See, I have on-going & unresolved Communication Issues:
A. My phone turns itself off for no reason without telling me
B. I forgot my password to retrieve voice mails
C. Carrying my phone in my front pocket means it speed-dials folks whose names start with "N," "L" and "J" of its own accord

Better to call early, and often ...



Wednesday's "The Volume Knob is my Glazed Donut" Playlist:

Communication Breakdown - Led Zepplin

Fall Classes - for men

(Tom sent me this; I'm merely passing it along ...)

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY Monday, October 23, 2007
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.

Classes begin Monday, October 30, 2007

Class 1
How To Fill Ice Cube Trays --- Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll --- Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and
Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub? --- Group Practice.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor ---
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturday at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5
After Dinner Dishes --- Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 6
Loss Of Identity --- Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM .

Class 7
Learning How To Find Things --- Starting With Looking In The Right Places
And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum .
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8
Health Watch --- Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday a t 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost --- Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesday at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.

Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks , Saturday noon , 2 hours.

Class 11
Learning to Live --- Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing .
Tuesday at 7:00 PM, location to be determined.

Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours ! Beginning at 7:00 PM .

Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy --- Remembering Anniversaries and
Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 14
The Stove/Oven --- What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesday at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

this is weird

Noticed that if I eat breakfast while on-line, I have zero association with the actual eating experience.

Meaning there's an empty plate on the table, I'm not hungry and I owe somebody three bucks.

Here comes the weekend

Yes, oh my YES ....

(It don't come easy)

Planet Terror

I hate Windows Vista. Vista truly proves the universe is de-energizing and moving into frozen, static flux. Vista is the operating system designed to make computers EZ for "normal people" by geeks visualizing what "normal people" must be like; since geeks never met one and could not communicate with one even if they had, Vista is absolutely the worst idea since New Coke.

Mr. Gates, Mr. Dell et al: Congratulations, you have all but driven your most fervent and ardent supporter, meaning me, toward the unthinkable.

You've succeeded in making Windows Vista so user-unfriendly and counter-intuitive, so mind-numbingly difficult to navigate ... and have bogged-down new "custom made" PCs with so many trial programs, I'm looking seriously at Macs.

Come to think of it, none of the Windows-based operating systems ever improved on DOS, did they? (At least, DOS worked.)

Please, not another Necktie Party

"Form follows function." - Horatio Greenough


Ok, so what's the FUNCTION of a necktie? I mean, seriously.

Hello all Earth stations:A necktie has no function; it's a DECORATION & a FASHION STATEMENT and only changes how we feel about OURSELVES.

Which sure sounds like unbridled VANITY to me.

Besides, God already knows what's hanging in your closet ... and wants us to show what's in our hearts instead.

Unmatched Performance - passion, passion passion

-meant to include this anecdote in last week's post "Why Bother?"


"Jim Clark's drive in the 1967 Italian Grand Prix is regarded one of the greatest ever in F1. After starting from pole, he was leading in his Lotus 49 (chassis R2), when a tyre punctured. He lost an entire lap while having the wheel changed in the pits. After rejoining sixteenth, Clark then showed his genius by driving at his own limit, something which was not required when leading.

"He ripped back through the field, progressively lowered the lap record, eventually equalling his pole time of 1m 28.5s, to regain the lost lap and the lead. He was narrowly ahead of Brabham and Surtees starting the last lap, but his car had not been filled with enough fuel for such a performance [italics added]— it faltered, and finally coasted across the finish line in third place. This performance is considered unmatched in the long history of F1." -wikipedia

Aye, thar be monsters ...

... and dragons and such.


See? I done told you so.

The Church Factory?

Before trying to live like Christ you must first live, worship, talk and dress like me … embracing all my legalistic rules and empty traditions.

In an off-hand remark in his elephant-hunting memoirs from the 1930s, John “Pondoro” Taylor quipped that the African missionaries that seemed most effective and had the longest-lasting impact were the White Fathers.

60 years ago the White Fathers were notorious among other missionary organizations, who considered them suspect trouble-makers for two reasons: the White Fathers didn’t try to “convert” Africans into Europeans.

And because the White Fathers thundered around Africa on motorcycles.

Esta noche

Tan salvaje, con ella manos en ella pelo.

musica.

Part 2, tomorrow there...

Part 2, tomorrow there are dragon races at the Marina to celebrate the Viking Invasion of Lake Hartwell, back in 957 AD.
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North 34, 29.025, West...

North 34, 29.025, West 082, 49.264. I'm anchored out here for the evening, it's still weird calling in post(?), but I'm anchored out because tomorrow
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All About Holga

Yes, certain thieves & scoundrels made sure I have no camera. But that's about to change:

"Holga is here to save you from a future of digital pixels and images shared on small screens on cameras or phones. We have all become numbed with photography, there is no denying it, but a chunky camera made almost entirely of plastic has been put on this Earth to save us. It will reawaken your vision, fill you with joy, make you see beauty when you thought it had disappeared forever, and bring out sunshine on a cloudy day." http://shop.lomography.com/holga/

Wiki-up on the $25 camera that blows the socks off all the digital-derring-do:
Holga camera

A big THANK YOU-

-for Big Jake

"What is going on is definitely more than a hint of immorality. These young people are pretending to live in the vows of marriage without understanding the covenant of marriage and the commitment, sacrifice, and hard work it takes to make a marriage work. To do this basically spits in the face of God and tells Him that His design for marriage is outdated and needs to be improved. God also says in 1 Corinthians 6:18 to flee from sexual immorality.

These youth are being deceived. What they are doing in their minds is getting as close to sin as they can without crossing “the line.” In doing this, they are being deceived into thinking that they are strong enough to avoid going farther into sin. Scripture doesn’t tell us to get as close as we can to “the line” as long as we don’t sin…scripture tells us to flee from sexual immorality and to be holy because God is holy. Our goal should be to see how much like Jesus we can be…not to see how much we can get away with without crossing a morality standard that we create and feel comfortable with.

One thing I learned long ago is that sin will take you farther than you want to go, and will cost you more than you were ever willing to pay."

Nosy nosy

Still no prospect of regular web access from my dock, which meant roaming around Marina City's parking lot in search of a wireless signal.

I started going online from Huddle House because there's a dude where I live who's convinced that I'm a "private investigator" and enjoys sneaking up to the truck and suddenly banging on the door while I'm online to demand "What the %#*! are you doing? Who the #$&! are you watching?"

After five surprise encounters with this guy (maybe he's too drunk to remember the first four times?), these confrontations start getting old. Scary even ... especially because not even "the dock regulars" know who he is, and his behavior's so weird some of them have become anxious to uh, make his acquaintance.

Anyway, back to the present.

So why do people feel so entitled to snoop and be so nosy? I mean, people walking past the table will practically stop and read my e-mails along with me. Even dudes with Spock-style phone pods screwed into their ear holes gape as if seeing something new from outer space.

It's not just bad manners; it's something to do with feeling entitled to butt-in and indulge without consequences.

[A few bugs yet] KEN taught me how to...

Ken taught me how to do this. Now, I will teach Ken the pirate dance.
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Can I post from my cell...

Can I post from my cell phone?
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I AM old, I AM stubborn

With irregular web access at Marina City, I've resorted to surfing/waffling at the local Huddle House.

I sit at the same place, in the same booth, every time. No matter that there's an air-conditioner leak in the ceiling over my head.

I still sit in the same place and on the same side of the booth every time. Because I won't be beaten even if drain drops keep falling on my head. Let it drain down on me.

Proof enough.

Before we get married, there's something you need to know ...

Wow, does that phrase strike terror in a lover's heart, or what?

[interrupted by phone call ...

9:19 pm Yep, that was my folks on the phone. Anyway ------]

Never mind the details & all the background info involving the past: when two believers who are in love with Christ find each other through the Holy Spirit, the past is dead. Totally & to everything.

On the other hand, here's some stinkers from the future that would likely kill engagement dead on the spot:

1) My career/children/church will always come first
2) Having nice things is important to me
3) My mom thinks we should ...

What's coming next ... a dual G5? [updated/explained]

Looks like I've been spending too much time with mac-Friends ... hmmm.

The above image is my most recent photo; sort of a major departure from previous stuff [below].

Why flippin' bother?!

Ferrari's Felipe Massa finished 3rd --- 12.8 seconds behind Ferrari teammate Kimi Räikkönen --- in Sunday's Grand Prix of China. Why is a 3rd place finish worth mentioning ... and why did it keep me up half of last night thinking about it?

Because even though he had ZERO CHANCE of closing the gap, Massa was driving successively faster laps to the finish, and drove the fastest lap of the race - of anybody- on the very last lap of the race.

What's up with that?

Massa coulda played it safe, coulda avoided taking chances, coulda thought "Well, I can't win so I'll slow down & ease off the throttle to avoid crashing" ... but instead he pulled out all the stops and drove all-out all the way to the finish.

That's the pure joy of driving the race. That's passion.

Race to win ... or drive something safe & practical like a Prius- and stay off the flippin' track.


A Purely Passionate PS:
Oooh, looks like Massa's a contender to win the 2007 Driver's Championship (a 3-way tie means the winner's gonna be decided two weeks from now in the Grand Prix of Brazil -- the last race of the season).

Aaah, wanna take a wild guess what country Massa happens to hail from?

In the end, all things figure

I previously mentioned that Ferrari's already won the 2007 F1 Constructor's Championship.

I didn't know this when I wrote yesterday's post, but it just figures ... and shows ta go ya:
Passion is everything.
Passion is all about winning.
Passion never dies.

See you in Sao Paulo

Lewis Hamilton's decision to eke a few more laps from his tires in yesterday's Grand Prix of China may have ruined the 20-year old McClaren-Mercedes driver's chance at becoming the first rookie ever to win a Formula 1 Driver's Championship.

After leading for most of the race, Hamilton entered the pit lane going just a bit too fast and slid into a gravel trap instead. That unbelievable, minuscule lapse of judgment means the championship will be decided two weeks from now in the last race of the season: The Grand Prix of Brazil.

F1 Page with photos here

So sex in marriage can't be sow n' sew?

Didn't guys used to own that old saw about needing to "sow their wild oats" before marriage?

But come on ladies, having 5 ... or 10 or 20 sexual partners before marriage doesn't come with a stigma (or label) attached any more, does it? Shoot, I've ever heard women explain their sexual habits according to the "take the test drive first" theory. So, sow, sew what?

So instead of taking test laps, I'd rather race from the driver's seat (doing the steering and the shifting myself) for the entire race ... instead of merely being another passenger riding along in the backseat, thank you very much.

-- -- You can't win races if you aren't passionate about driving -- --

Forget rationalizations like "Well, compared to girls like so-and-so" or "Times have changed" or "Lots of girls/guys are worse than me ..." or even "Numbers don't matter." Having casual sex (in any form, thank you Ms Lewinski) .... or using the excuse "I'm just getting some experience under my belt" or even daydreaming with mechanical curiosity about "I wonder what it would be like with so-and-so ..." are sew STOOPID. For girls and for guys.

-- oooh uh oh, he's standing on the gas coming out of the corner ----

Here's a CRAZY FANTASY: What about the idea of sharing all your sexual sewing (in all its intrigues) with one person ... forever? Like, with a person who's proven they've been worth waiting for - and feels the same way about you?

Or, since you've already absorbed all the sleaziness our profit-motived culture's convinced you must be "real life," does the idea of having just one sexual partner sound impossibly boring & dull? Do it? Does it?

Only for those so-and-so's stymied by an embarrassingly Spectacular deficit of Passion and Romantic uh, Imagination.

It aint me

Like this a lot.

More volume if you please, Mr Scott.

Huddle Up [2 scrambled, grits, 2 biscuits, a waffle ... and a tiger tale]

A few loose odds 'n ends in time for the weekend ...

- What Kinda Crazy Nut Would Do This?
At 6:45 am there musta been 70 bass boats on the water, poised in a half-circle near the gas dock. Looked like they were waiting for a 7AM Starting Signal to begin a weekend tournament ... then I saw another dozen waiting to be off-loaded from their trailers.

OK, I don't understand why anybody'd get up and leave the house by 2:00 AM to go bass-fishing, I just don't.

Especially when Live Formula 1 Qualifying from the Grand Prix of China stayed on until 3AM. ---And if you can't watch racing live, why bother?

- Francis Lands On Double-Overtime Secret Phone Restriction, Indeed
I love Francis dearly, ya'll know this. But while she's always had a sense of humor, in the past few months her wit has become spontaneous, razor-sharp & blistering. Problem is, we wait till the rates go down at 9PM ... so by the time we get off the phone I'm laughing so hard I can't even think about falling asleep and end up sleep-deprived the next day.

Francis, stop making me laugh so hard. So late and so often. Indeed.

-I Refuse To Believe In Gravity
Somebody fell on the dock the other day. I've seen lots of people fall and think falling is unfair. They say it's because of gravity, but I just can't believe gravity would be so unfair. That's how I came to the conclusion gravity doesn't exist. Because I don't like falling.

-I Hope You're Still Not Here To Read This
Yesterday I heard that high school kids are having sex "like animals in a zoo."

Does that explain why they can't read, or find South Carolina on a map?

-Finally, I Reckon
After bombing in theaters, Grindhouse is out on DVD.

-pApa'S PURe wReTChed MeAneSS Department
The other day a friend over on Dock 14 told me, "You ever need tickets to home games, let me know. I got two for ya anytime you want 'em." True.

Gosh too bad I'm a Spurrier fan, eh?

Feelin’ Good Faith, Day Trippers & Daydream Believers

7:23 PM

My heart’s broken because you still don’t believe – why even bother pretending that you do?

You can’t even wake up without an alarm clock, stay in touch without a cell phone, program your TiVo … or have a meaningful relationship and still keep all your clothes on … yet somehow you know more than the Creator, and think you’ve worked a private “deal.”

Because you think God wrote the Bible for other people. Because you think God must’ve negotiated 1 trillion deals & Exceptions Clauses (like yours … because that’s the only way you’d get one) in the past 2000 years?

So stop the flippin’ sinning already.

See, your life remains exactly that. Yours … and you aren’t even ashamed to let everyone see it. Your life is spelled out in big bold electric letters at all your exits along LIFE’S HIGHWAY (just so you don’t forget when it’s time to get off?):

MY life exits and takes My-Wanna Adventure Highway here … because your route leads to your career, your conveniences, your interpretations, your lifestyle, your choices and your expectations.

Might wanna get ready for some Breakdowns and Layovers prior to arriving at your disappointment destination, too.

"Why do you call me, 'Lord, Lord,' and do not do what I say?"

My NetFlix

	Val Lewton: Isle of the Dead / Bedlam		NR	Horror	Shipping today
2	Night Watch		R	Foreign	10/03/07	10/04/07
3	Life and Debt		NR	Documentary	10/03/07	10/04/07
4	Find Me Guilty		R	Drama	10/03/07	10/04/07
5	The White Hell of Pitz Palu		NR	Foreign	10/03/07	10/04/07
6	Fidel

Big Snappers anxious to meet you!

"Swimming: Lake Hartwell has 15 designated public swim beaches. There are hundreds of Island and shoreline beaches throughout the lake. Water temperatures may be suitable for swimming from May through October. There are no alligators, jellyfish, poisonous snakes or other unusual swimming hazards." http://www.lake-hartwell.com/GreatLake/LakeActivities.htm

Uh, Uh-Oh ... YES THERE ARE ALLIGATORS in LAKE HARTWELL ... and their disposal is your responsibility.

Awesome.

Meet Mrs Moorhead

Sherry's cool.

Die Weiße Hölle vom Piz Palü

I've been waiting TEN YEARS to see this movie!

And it's coming tomorrow via NetFlix ... oh joy.

Clueless, clueless - UPDATED

Went to the grocery store this afternoon and saw a girl who looked awfully familiar.

In the checkout line I glanced over, she was already glancing over, a rhythm sorta developed from there, she seemed so familiar I guessed she was trying to remember, too.

After taking longer than it shoulda, when I glanced up after paying she was gone.

No bells are ringing ... so familiar, but still can't remember what's missing.

I think I recognized her from the donut room, the Fine Arts Building, Sunday mornings back at AC.

Creativity!

I love cheesecake; I hate strawberries.

Today by accident, I discovered Chili Cheesecake & my culinary world will never be the same.

(Nor will my digestion)

This is how trouble starts, right here

I'm live at an undisclosed Huddle House location (with web access).

I got chili, cheesecake ... and one spoon.